20 June 2008

Transitions

To continue my last post...

Given Cindy's comment (her concern isn't a possibility at our church as there are well over 500 members), I've been thinking about the balance between community and cleaving.

For a single person who has been rightly encouraged to be involved in the lives of others, investing in them and letting them invest in him in return, there's a huge transition in getting married.

Instead of thinking of the feelings of lots of others, one's new spouse becomes pre-eminent and that one person must be considered above and possibly against all others (after the Lord, I'm talkin' horizontal relationships in this post).

That doesn't mean that the new couple doesn't continue to invest in the lives of others, but it does change the nature of that investment and those other relationships.

SDG!
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  1. Cindy MarschJune 21, 2008 9:33 AM

    Lynne, I heard something on a radio program today that seemed wise to me (and what we did): the couple needs to plan ahead of time how they will transition into their honeymoon, that "leaving and cleaving" has an important moment as they pull away from the wedding reception. I have known friends to have a post-wedding brunch to show up at the next morning. We drove away for a week-long honeymoon and then had a conference to go to the next week (where we were very much KNOWN as newlyweds and joked about--it was a bit uncomfortable!). I personally prefer the idea of nice car rides, quiet inns, long walks to airports, long flights, Customs, and whirlwind tours of exotic locales. But the couple need to agree on what they expect--a gift-opening party with relatives the day after the wedding, or the week after? Or more privacy and togetherness in those early days.

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